


Strange Bedfellows

by Aqualisier



Category: Fullmetal Alchemist: Brotherhood & Manga
Genre: Chocolate Box Exchange 2019, Gen, Missing Scene, Swearing
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-02-08
Updated: 2019-02-08
Packaged: 2019-10-24 11:11:20
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,700
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17703263
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Aqualisier/pseuds/Aqualisier
Summary: Shortly after taking over Ling's body, Greed decides to have a quick chat. Ling is understandably wary. Set during canon.





	Strange Bedfellows

**Author's Note:**

  * For [TereziMakara](https://archiveofourown.org/users/TereziMakara/gifts).



"Hey, you."

No response. "Tch." Greed narrowed his eyes. "I know you're still alive and kicking in there, kid. Answer me."

_'Mnnh?'_ The Xing brat--Ling, if he remembered correctly--sounded tired, as if Greed has just woken him up from a nap. Maybe he had. Was it even possible for him to nap in there? _'Are you talking to me?'_

"Who else would I be talking to?" He gestured towards the empty air around them. Not so much as a pigeon anywhere within earshot. He--well, _they_ \--were sitting on a rooftop, one leg pulled up to their chest and one dangling over the edge. It was a long way down, but that didn't really matter, now, did it?

_'Well, you haven't exactly been all that chatty with me since you took control.'_ Ling frowned. _'What's up?'_

'What's up,' he'd said? Greed laughed under his breath. This kid was _weird_. Here he was, a foreign entity that literally invaded his body, stole his autonomy, yet he addressed him so... casually. Calmly, even, like he wasn't so much as _annoyed_ with him. He damn well should have been.

...It was actually a little unnerving, but he pushed that thought aside.

"Pops told me you and the Fullmetal Alchemist escaped from Gluttony's stomach," he said. "That's pretty impressive."

_'What of it?'_

"I'm just curious how you pulled it off, is all." He leaned back, half-smile plastered across his face, and looked up at the sky as clouds rolled across the sun. "Dad sure as hell didn't know. Said it should have been impossible. But, well, you know what they say. Nothing's impossible."

Ling didn't respond immediately. When he did, his tone was even--guarded. _'...Why are you so talkative all of a sudden?'_

Greed scoffed. "I'm _bored_. Literally, that's all there is to it. Jeez, what's even the point of having a voice in the back of your head if you can't even have a conversation?"

_'That's... that's it? You're just... bored?'_

Why the incredulous tone? "Yeah, obviously. Don't imagine it's all that fun for you in there either."

_'...Huh.'_

Sharing a headspace was a new experience for both of them, and it didn't mean sharing thoughts, apparently. Greed could generally get a read on Ling's emotions and surface thoughts--he had tried going deeper out of curiosity, but hit a brick wall--but when he got all pensive like this he was totally opaque. He didn't like it. He didn't like not knowing things. And he definitely didn't like the stifling atmosphere in his head when Ling secluded himself in his own thoughts.

Ling sighed. _'Well, Envy was there with us, so it's not exactly classified information. Alright, I'll tell you, in exchange for a favor.'_

Oh yeah, Envy would know too, would't he? Whatever, it was less trouble to just ask Ling, who was right here. Besides, even from the little time he'd spent with Envy he got the sense that the two of them wouldn't exactly be best buddies.

"What is it? I'm not giving you your body back, if that's what you're gonna ask," Greed said, the corner of his mouth twitching into a smirk.

_'Not exactly,'_ Ling said. _'I want to deliver a message to my retainer. I'm not going to be able to see her for a while in this state, but I... I need to let her know that I'm alive.'_

Greed's smile faded. He did recall him mentioning a retainer, come to think of it--the one who'd cut her arm off to save his life, or something. The one he wouldn't be able to face if he returned home empty-handed. Something about that struck a chord within him, and a faint pain seared through his chest. He pushed it aside as quickly as it came, and laughed. "Oh, you've got a lady waiting for you, huh? Sure, whatever, no harm in that." Besides, he'd be able to intercept it if he gave away any important information Ling might have picked up. "So, how'd you even end up in Gluttony's stomach alive in the first place?"

_'Accident, apparently.'_ Ling shrugged. _'He went out of control and was devouring everything in sight. Ed, Envy, and myself just got caught in the crossfire.'_

"Ed?"

_'Fullmetal.'_

Right, he had a name. "Oh, yeah. So, then what? What was it like in there?"

_'In Gluttony's stomach? Uhh... unpleasant?'_ Ling said. _'The smell was terrible, and we were ankle deep in a sea of blood wherever we went. Oh, and there were a bunch of rotting corpses, and other things I guess he'd eaten over the years.'_

"Gross."

Ling crossed his arms. _'Hey, you're the one who asked.'_ Then he let out an exhausted sigh, and added, _'...Honestly, though, it_ was _terrible. I've never felt so hopeless and trapped in my life. Even Envy thought we were going to die in there. Heh... I would have, if Ed hadn't been there. He went back for me when I was too hungry to go on, fed me his shoe, and then pulled us all out by performing human transmutation on himself, or... something. I'm a bit fuzzy on the details myself, much less how he figured out that it would work. And here I am.'_

"Huh." Greed went silent for a moment. Should he be grateful to Fullmetal, too? After all, he wouldn't have this body if Ling had been left to die in that hellhole, and, unexpected passenger aside, it _was_ pretty nice. It was nice being outside the sewers of Central, able to taste the fresh air and stretch his limbs. It made him feel... hm, he wasn't sure. Nostalgic? No, that couldn't be it. He furrowed his brow.

...Wait a second.

"He... fed you his shoe?"

_'Yep. Guess I'm lucky that he's tacky enough to wear leather boots in the first place.'_

Greed couldn't help himself--he burst out laughing. "HAHAHAHAHAHA! Holy shit, a _shoe_! You ate a _shoe_! Oh my God, that's _hilarious_! A prince of Xing, eating a _shoe_!"

Ling went silent for a moment, then chuckled, and a moment later joined in laughing full force. _'Isn't it?!'_

"What did it _taste_ _like_?" Greed managed between gales of laughter.

_'It was the worst thing I've ever tasted!'_  Ling laughed harder. _'And that was his_ automail _foot! I don't even want to imagine what eating the other shoe would have been like, if it came to that!'_

"What, are you saying--" another laughing fit, "are you saying it's only a five-star meal if it's _not_ served with a side of toe jam?"

_'Hahaha, h-honestly,'_ Ling wheezed. _'I can't believe... my life was saved by Ed's tacky fashion! First thing I'm doing when I become emperor is put that in the history books. Edward Elric, state alchemist of Amestris--the man who fed the emperor a shoe. I bet he'll_ love _that.'_

Greed abruptly stopped laughing. _Right_. "'When you become emperor?'" he said with a frown. "I already told you, kid. You're not getting this body back."

That stifling feeling flooded back--cold, awkward, unlike the laughter they had shared just moments before. Ling remained composed--though his smile dropped just as quickly. It was _uncomfortable. 'Hm, oh well. It was worth a try.'_

"Still," Greed added with a chuckle, trying to lighten the mood, "that is a pretty funny story. How about I put it in the history books when I take over the world, instead?"

Ling tilted his head, expression still impassive. _'I'm looking forward to it,'_ he said. _'Anyway, that's the story. Now, about that message?'_

"Right, right," he muttered. "Just do what you gotta do. Don't go running off or anything, you hear? If you do, I'm never letting you out again."

It was weird, just letting Ling take over. He'd usurped control once or twice before, but only for brief moments. Not long enough for Greed to actually feel his body going through the motions with someone else at the wheel. If that's what Ling had to put up with all this time, then it really _was_ pretty strange that he didn't seem all that pissed with him. He sure would be, if their positions were reversed.

"Hmm," Ling said, rummaging through his pockets.

_'What's up?'_

"I don't have a pen and paper."

Before Greed could respond, he ripped a section of cloth from his pants. _'HEY!'_

"What's wrong?" Ling asked, biting into his thumb.

_'Those are my clothes, asshole!'_

"Actually, they're _my_ clothes," Ling hummed, tracing his thumb across the white fabric. "They're in tatters anyway. I'm sure you can find something better. Annnd... done."

As promised, he handed control back to Greed, who was left staring blankly at the scrap of cloth in his hands.

"...What the hell is this."

_'What do you mean?'_

"These _squiggles_!" He turned the cloth upside down and stretched it, as if that would somehow make the characters any more legible. "I thought you were writing a message to your retainer!"

_'I did,'_ Ling said plainly. _'It's Xingese. You know, our native language? Why would I have written it in Amestrian?'_ Fuck. _'Don't worry, I didn't say anything about you or the homunculi at all.'_

"Xi--" Greed took a deep breath, grumbled, and shoved the scrap of cloth in his pocket. Why hadn't he thought of that? Well, he wasn't going to go back on their deal just because he was apparently a complete fucking moron. "Fine, whatever. How do you expect me to deliver this thing, anyway? I'm not gonna hand back control just so you can track her down. For all I know, she's all the way back in Xing."

_'Just find Ed,'_ he said. _'He'll know where she is. I'm sure you don't need my help picking_ him _out of a crowd?'_

"Nah, I've got this." He hopped off the roof in one fluid motion, coating his legs in carbon to shield his fall. From the back of his mind, he could tell Ling's interest was piqued, but Greed wasn't sure why. Was it the display of power just now, or was it something else? Well, whatever. He could deal with this.

"First things first, though. We're getting some new clothes."

**Author's Note:**

> So, story time. I've been into FMA for... God, almost ten years now. And literally in all that time I NEVER considered shipping these two, the thought just didn't cross my mind as being like... an option, until VERY recently, and as soon as that lightbulb flickered on they damn near immediately skyrocketed to one of my all-time OTPs. I have no idea how I slept on these two for so long, holy shit. Except, well... this was VERY recent. Like, after-this-year's-Chocobox-signups-were-already-closed recent. Whoops?
> 
> Anyway, I was dying for the chance to write these two and this prompt was the perfect opportunity. I had a lot of fun, so I might write more of them in the future. :D Happy Valentine's Day!


End file.
